My husband often accuses me of trying to control time and if I'm being honest, he's right. I want to slow it down, stop it in certain moments, or sometimes make it fly. Of course, like everyone else, I am incapable of this but it doesn't stop me from trying.
In the last few years, I've been attempting to teach myself how to just live every day without worrying about the next one. This is next to impossible for me because I can't not (yes, I see the double negative) think about the next thing. I have learned to enjoy the moments more though by truly being 'in' them.
I read an article a long time ago that said that as parents and teachers we often get frustrated with children because they are distracting us from something we were doing, rather than because of something they are doing. The article suggested that when you give your full attention to one thing, it leaves less room for frustration. Basically, if you're not dividing yourself into multiple pieces to do everything at once, you're likely to enjoy the focus activity more and become less frustrated even when problems arise. Since reading this article (I don't remember the source), if I've said I would play with my kids, I play. If I've said I want to sit down and write, I write (perhaps multiple things as once like right this minute, but still, one general activity). If I am teaching a lesson, I am involved in that lesson and not trying to plan the next one in the brief moments of down time. It's helped. I know that what I need to do is still going to be there even if I give something my full attention for a period of time. Likely, each thing that I give my attention to turns out better because I'm not being pulled in multiple directions.
Throughout the holidays, I've really enjoyed the time with my family, being with friends, the chance to sleep in, and the chance to write without worrying about what I should be planning for the classroom. On Monday though, it's back to juggling all of it together and tossing in piano lessons, gymnastics, making lunches, staff meetings and so on. It's easy to find balance when you elminate say, a forty hour work week. It's harder to find it when life returns to normal.
I'm not one for resolutions because I don't like disappointing myself. I've made the exact same 'goals' for the past several new years; be a better person, be healthier, worry less. These goals continue to be my life resolutions rather than my new year ones. So instead of an actual resolution, I try to combine these goals with my life long quest for balance. As reality encroaches, I remind myself that I have been very successful juggling all of these things. It's really difficult though, after spending the better part of the last 16 days in pajamas, grabbing snacks whenever, staying up late to read and play on my iPad or iPhone, and sleeping until I'm not tired, to imagine getting up at 6:30 Monday morning.
Part of me thinks I should jump back in right now: go to bed on time, begin prepping my Monday lessons, and plan out my dinner menu for the next couple of weeks. But, since the post is called back to reality, I might as well be realisitc and acknowledge that what I'm really going to do is write as much as I possibly can in the next two days, stay in my pajamas, eat junk food, play word games, and cuddle my kids while we watch too much T.V. Everything else, can wait until Monday.
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